New Games |
- Gunpoint designer's new Game Maker tutorial series is great for beginners
- Bonkin' Donski: A Destructoid Sexytime Video
- Miyamoto thinks F-Zero needs a 'new type of controller interface'
- The Assassin's Creed movie is probably totally, definitely, absolutely releasing in 2016
- Smite's Xbox One beta sign-ups are open
- Games that remind me of my Arizona vacation
- New BioWare game Shadow Realms possibly 'rebooted'
- Team Fortress 2sdays: A new year of TF2sdays begins
- My name is Brittany and I'm a gaming sadist
- Woah Dave! out now on Vita, free for Plus members!
- What is your most anticipated game of 2015?
- Assassin's Creed Unity's free DLC is a week away, and it looks too spooky
- Destructoid's most wanted games of 2015
- Mad Catz' new controller looks like a Michael Bay Decepticon
- The Depths of Tolagal is fairly brutal, but it's also addictive
- Riot Games building dedicated network for League of Legends traffic
- Mike and Will deliver some medieval haircuts in Game of Thrones
- Zombies, monsters, Captain America: Call of Duty is different in China
- Little Mac got some air game with 'crazy aerial death combo'
- Wolfenstein, Prince of Persia, Softporn II: 2,400 MS-DOS games playable free in-browser
- Majora's Mask 3D special edition gets Skull Kid figure
- Alaska, vampires, Jurassic Park: Ubisoft polls future Far Cry settings
- Do you trust Techland to make a good game?
- Old Man Kung Lao shuffles his weary bones to the next Mortal Kombat tournament
- Wikipad will debut its iPad controller in March
- Nintendo offering limited edition New 3DS to Club Nintendo members
- Man at Arms crafts Dante's Rebellion Sword from Devil May Cry
| Gunpoint designer's new Game Maker tutorial series is great for beginners Posted: 06 Jan 2015 11:30 AM PST As someone who has tinkered with Game Maker a few times before, made little to no tangible progress, and called it quits only to try again moments later and then really call it quits, this new video tutorial series from Gun Point and Heat Signature designer Tom Francis is great. It's intended for beginners, with part one, embedded above, titled "Writing your first code." Francis says he plans to put out "about two to four half-hour episodes each week," and he's hosting the source code for the project over here should you need to double check your work. "If you want to be a programmer, this is a terrible series to watch," he says. "This is much more about just getting something up and running as quickly and easily as possible ... Not doing anything the kind of good, hard way, but doing everything the easy, cheap, hacky way, which will come back to haunt you later if you're making a big product or working on a team." Gotta start somewhere. [Via PC Gamer] |
| Bonkin' Donski: A Destructoid Sexytime Video Posted: 06 Jan 2015 11:00 AM PST Apparently there's a porn actress going around dressing like Anita Sarkeesian and performing explicit acts on-camera, taking the concept of harassment to some kind of goddamn astral plane. We here at Destructoid could not let this new craze pass us by without some manner of horrific exploitation, like taking babies from a candy salesman. So, as one of Destructoid's new video personalities (a title I have applied to myself), I am proud to announce Bonkin' Donski, the first in Destructoid's new series of pornographic films. Join associate editor Brett Makedonski as he gets his cable fixed right before his cable gets fixed. I'm talking about some kind of penile manipulation, if you feel me. We plan to follow up this assuredly popular release with such titles as Andy's Anus, Occam's Electric Vibrator, Patrick Hand-Cock (like a handjob except it's a pun), Mustache Rides with Conrad, Swallow Good: The Jordan De-Vore Story, and Having Sex With Jonathan Holmes. These high-quality programs will contain only the sickest camera angles, and the knee-slapping-est carnal behaviors. Now that's a Destructoid Guarantee™! Each VHS will cost you about $800.85, because we're making VHS tapes in 2015. That shit's expensive! |
| Miyamoto thinks F-Zero needs a 'new type of controller interface' Posted: 06 Jan 2015 10:30 AM PST In a recent appearance on Smosh Games (interview starts at 4:35), Nintendo's Shigeru Miyamoto touched on a range of topics, including the future of F-Zero and Pikmin. The famed designer gave a concise update on the latter series -- "We will continue to make Pikmin games," he said through translator Bill Trinen -- but as for F-Zero, well, it's complicated: "We see a lot of other designers who are kind of making more traditional racing style of games," he began. "So, we've tried to focus on something that feels a little bit more game-y. So, maybe if we create a new type of controller interface, and we find a controller interface that's particularly suited for F-Zero, then maybe we'll do something with it in the future." Oh, Miyamoto. Always trying to surprise and delight. |
| The Assassin's Creed movie is probably totally, definitely, absolutely releasing in 2016 Posted: 06 Jan 2015 10:00 AM PST Just like the legendary Morrissey, stop me if you think you've heard this one before: a silver screen adaption of a popular videogame has a definite (albeit far off) release date. This time, it's Assassin's Creed, and it's totally coming out in 2016. Bet the farm on it. According to Hollywood Reporter, Fox recently dated a bunch of upcoming flicks, and Assassin's Creed, starring Michael Fassbender, is slated for December 21, 2016. That's one week after the first of the Star Wars spin-offs. Realistically, Assassin's Creed's date relative to those of other movies probably doesn't matter much. This project's languished in production hell for many years, as have several other videogame movies. Any seemingly positive news should most likely be taken with a grain of salt. The only good omen is that the studio hasn't completely forgotten it exists. Fox Dates 'Gambit,' 'Assassin's Creed,' 'Greatest Showman on Earth' [The Hollywood Reporter via Joystiq] |
| Smite's Xbox One beta sign-ups are open Posted: 06 Jan 2015 09:30 AM PST You can now sign up for the Xbox One beta test of Smite, Hi-Rez Studios' third-person, mythological MOBA. I'd recommend it to anyone who's curious about the genre but can't seem to get into Dota 2 or League of Legends. Be sure to try Awesomenauts while you're at it. On the PC front, Smite's $2.5 million World Championship begins this Friday in Atlanta, GA. Someone's gonna have a real nice weekend with that kind of prize pool up for grabs. Good lord. |
| Games that remind me of my Arizona vacation Posted: 06 Jan 2015 09:00 AM PST "My body is ready." That was the first message I sent to our staff-wide chat client this year, and it's true: I'm back from a holiday break, ready to write. For once, I wasn't glued to my email or Twitter while vacationing. It was refreshing to step away from the Internet -- and games, excluding a few necessary air-travel time-wasters -- for a whole week. To catch my breath at long last. (Thanks for the extra push in the right direction, spotty 3G service and limited Wi-Fi connection. I needed that encouragement.) Not a moment after signaling my return this week, Kyle sounded off in chat, suggesting I write about my time off in Arizona. Usually, our working relationship is flipped -- he comes up with offbeat ideas, initially doubts them, and I tell him to push past the discomfort. Those same ideas frequently go on to become some of my favorite pieces published on Destructoid. I'm confident this post won't reach such heights, but that's okay. Coming up with games reminiscent of my first trip to the Grand Canyon State was too fun a concept to pass on. |
| New BioWare game Shadow Realms possibly 'rebooted' Posted: 06 Jan 2015 08:45 AM PST BioWare's upcoming four-on-one modern fantasy multiplayer game Shadow Realms has been "rebooted," according to sources at Kotaku. The game will supposedly change from an episodic free-to-play title to a full release. This news marks the first publicly -- albeit unofficial -- details regarding Shadow Realms' payment scheme. The episodic nature of the game was always in play, regardless of how it would be sold. During PAX Prime 2014, BioWare told Destructoid that should Shadow Realms be sold on-disc, its world would be fully accessible, with new story missions releasing for free over the course of a season. This appears to have changed. "Two industry sources say they heard Shadow Realms was cancelled, but a third, reliable source familiar with goings-on at BioWare Austin says the game was overhauled in late October and will now have a full campaign," reports Kotaku. Shadow Realms will also make use of Electronic Arts' Origin service, bypassing the budget cut EA-owned studios receive for not using "internal technology and services." The game is supposedly set for a 2017 release on PS4, Xbox One, and PC. Sources: BioWare's Shadow Realms In Flux, Possibly Rebooted [Kotaku] |
| Team Fortress 2sdays: A new year of TF2sdays begins Posted: 06 Jan 2015 08:30 AM PST Happy Tuesday! I hope all of you had an awesome New Years and I want to be the first to welcome you back to Team Fortress 2sdays! Since it's the start of a new year, we may have some people here who are unfamiliar with TF2sdays, everything you need to know is listed below. TF2days is a community run event that happens each Tuesday evening (there's both an early and late game). We have our own dedicated server and everyone who plays is an absolutely awesome person. |
| My name is Brittany and I'm a gaming sadist Posted: 06 Jan 2015 08:00 AM PST I ventured out to the vet's office a few weeks ago with a Miniature Pinscher in tow. Sam Fisher (the same of Third Echelon fame), my beloved pup, was to see the doctor for a regular checkup and heartworm test. While waiting in the lobby, I overheard other patrons discussing the abuse of a three-month-old Labrador puppy and the damage inflicted upon its tiny limbs. Tears welled up in my eyes nearly instantly. My fists involuntarily clenched themselves up, searching for the victim they would rain down searing pain upon should I ever meet them. |
| Woah Dave! out now on Vita, free for Plus members! Posted: 06 Jan 2015 07:30 AM PST Woah Dave!, the fantastic little arcade game from the house that built Bit.Trip, is now available on PlayStation Vita for the low, low price of $5 -- or nothing if you're a PlayStation Plus subscriber. Cool boss Jonathan Holmes gave Woah Dave! a favorable appraisal when it launched late last year for Nintendo 3DS and PC, explaining "if you can get past the game's deceptively simple surface and are content to challenge yourself after the game stops providing new carrots to chase, you'll find Woah Dave! to be well worth your pennies." You can check out the rest of this month's PlayStation Plus lineup right here. Whoa Dave! [PlayStation Store via Choice Provisions] |
| What is your most anticipated game of 2015? Posted: 06 Jan 2015 07:00 AM PST The dust has barely settled on 2014, but we at Destructoid are already looking to the future! Why? Because the future is awesome. Duh. The Dtoid staff have shared our personal picks for our most wanted games of 2015, and now it's your turn to share yours! To participate, just vote in the community poll below! It's just that easy. Did we miss your game? What idiots we are! Please do us a favor and write it in the "other" slot and then reply to my comment below so I can add it! Once you've voted, be sure to tell us your choice in the comments so we can all hnnnnnggg over videogames together. Have fun! |
| Assassin's Creed Unity's free DLC is a week away, and it looks too spooky Posted: 06 Jan 2015 06:30 AM PST Assassin's Creed Unity was mostly an adventure that took place on the crowded Parisian streets, all jam-packed with people. The game's first add-on looks to be similarly populated -- not by lively dissenters, but by the skulls, bones, and spirits of the post-alive. Ubisoft announced today that the Dead Kings DLC, which is free for all Unity owners, will release on January 13. In the accompanying cinematic trailer, we see that much of Arno's time is spent in the Saint Denis underground selectively touching human remains and swinging sharp weapons on rope bridges. Anyone that's interested in Arno's Big Catacomb Adventure, but hasn't yet pulled the trigger on the base game might find some use in an Amazon deal that bundles Unity and Black Flag together for under $30. For those that already own Unity, nothing to do but sit back and wait for the deceased royalty. |
| Destructoid's most wanted games of 2015 Posted: 06 Jan 2015 06:00 AM PST Ugh. Mondays, am I right? They're a day that people don't like because you have to do stuff and things after (maybe) not having to do those things, you know? Lame. Let's turn our frowns upside down and instead talk about something positive: videogames we are real keen on playing this year. 2015 can't be any worse than 2014, where most of our most anticipated games ended up not coming out at all. Plus, there's Metal Gear and Persona to look forward to. And all those games that got pushed into 2015 like Batman and The Witcher. And cool stuff like Hyper Light Drifter and the full release of Invisible Inc and that waifu bartending game. Plus The Last Guardian, Half-Life 3, Agent, Final Fantasy XV, Prey 2, God Hand 2, MediEvil 3, Bushido Blade 3. Man, it's going to be a great year!!! |
| Mad Catz' new controller looks like a Michael Bay Decepticon Posted: 06 Jan 2015 05:45 AM PST I can't look away from Mad Catz' new controller for Android devices and PC. I just can't. The L.Y.N.X. 9 is meant to "offer a premium [see: $299.99; yes, really] gaming experience in almost any situation," though it's primarily geared toward mobile gaming with its transforming design. The gamepad can morph to dock a phone or tablet, hence its ugly yet practical appearance, and there's also a full QWERTY keyboard attachment. The L.Y.N.X. works with Windows 7/8/8.1 and can link your Android device of choice to a television via an included cable, if you'd like. Have to wonder how big the market for this sort of thing is. Ships in March. L.Y.N.X. 9 Mobile Hybrid Controller for Android Smartphones and Tablets, & PC [Mad Catz] |
| The Depths of Tolagal is fairly brutal, but it's also addictive Posted: 06 Jan 2015 05:30 AM PST Knowing my penchant for habitually tinkering around with retro-inspired roguelike games that I dig up on Steam, community badass and all-around awesome person Phil Ken Sebben tapped me on the shoulder the other day to make sure that I didn't miss out on Angry Toad Studios' launch of The Depths of Tolagal, and I'm really glad that he did. With an art style that looks to me heavily inspired by the earlier Final Fantasy titles (of which I cut my first set of RPG teeth), Depths could easily get lost in the shuffle of the many, many dungeon-crawlers sporting that look. Don't let that fool you, though. Angry Toad's manages to nail that "just-one-more-run" hook that I've grown to love in roguelikes. If you're a fan of the genre and patient enough to enjoy your roguelikes a bit on the tougher end of the scale, The Depths of Tolagal is rewarding. The $9.99 asking price might be a bit high for some but I feel that in my case, I definitely got my money's worth. Thanks, Mike! |
| Riot Games building dedicated network for League of Legends traffic Posted: 06 Jan 2015 05:15 AM PST Riot Games has been toiling away on a new network designed to improve player connections to League of Legends. Detailed in a forum thread, this dedicated network will provide more direct connections to game servers, with the aim of improving stability, while reducing congestion and the distance packets have to travel. The system is expected to be fully implemented by the end of March, though ongoing negotiations with internet service providers could impact that target. Sounds like a positive development. There are few things worse than playing a multiplayer game with a dodgy connection to a distant server, especially one where fractions of a second can make a huge difference, and that Riot is demonstrating a dedication to minimizing that experience for its users is a great thing. There is this niggling concern scratching away at the back of my mind, that users of some ISPs may suffer from a connection made inferior through improvement to a majority of other user connections, if their provider hasn't joined the club and provided direct access to the new network. Riot is paying attention to this, encouraging users who have experienced instability since November to fill out a survey to help them improve service for as many users as possible. [Via Eurogamer] |
| Mike and Will deliver some medieval haircuts in Game of Thrones Posted: 06 Jan 2015 05:00 AM PST As Ol' Westwater and I continued our dangerous journey through Westeros, we came across a Barbershop Emergency™ in progress. Now, we couldn't just pass by and leave that poor man with that haircut, so we thought it'd be a good idea to help him out...with our broadsword. We also start getting a political lay of the land, as the rest of House Forrester begins to make itself known. This is a good encapsulation of Telltale's modern style; some borderline clunky action, you walk around for a little bit, then you do a lot of talking. It's still pretty interesting, but man, this is a Telltale-ass game. |
| Zombies, monsters, Captain America: Call of Duty is different in China Posted: 06 Jan 2015 04:30 AM PST In China, the Call of Duty series is devoid of Kevin Spacey, but that doesn't mean they won't try to sell it with big American actors. This live-action trailer for Call of Duty Online, the China-exclusive free-to-play Call of Duty, features Captain America's (and Snowpiercer's) Chris Evans. There are also some lacking CG zombies and Gears of War style giant monsters. |
| Little Mac got some air game with 'crazy aerial death combo' Posted: 06 Jan 2015 04:00 AM PST Little Mac must've found some Air Jordans so he could be Like Mike because someone found him some air game like he put his hand on the basketball from Space Jam and stole Starscream's powers. Maybe those Reebok Pumps worked out for him, or he got all 17 Air Bud movies on DVD for Christmas, especially the one with all the puppies. I don't know why my brain pinballed between those things, but anyway, here's a cool Super Smash Bros. combo for Little Mac from former Sup Holmes guest ZeRo that works best on beefier characters. The original instance of this move is here, while a lovely Smasher (above) broke it down for those of us whose brains don't work at Vine/fighting game speeds. |
| Wolfenstein, Prince of Persia, Softporn II: 2,400 MS-DOS games playable free in-browser Posted: 06 Jan 2015 03:30 AM PST The Internet Archive has added to its archive with nearly 2,400 MS-DOS games that are all playable right in your browser, right here. I've flitted between between Prince of Persia, Donkey Kong, and Aladdin within minutes, mostly abandoning them after remembering that I hate playing platformers with a keyboard. Also, what. This Donkey Kong is messed up. I also checked out Softporn II as soon as I read the name. The lewd, 1985 text adventure is meant to set you up with, "the female of your choice" (ahh, yes, the female) whom you give commands like "have her lick my rod." There are even 22 endings, including the 1 true ending wherein "you get rich." Unfortunately, after naming myself, the male, "pornman," and the woman, "porngal" (black hair, brown eyes), I was immediately stumped by Softporn II. It asked for porngal's bust measurement and wouldn't accept, "hell yeah," "big" or "tits." I entered a number at random, completely unaware of what it would translate to in real-life proportions, and did the same for the waist and hip measurements. The game responded, "If you want a freak show, go the circus." Rude. I have no idea what these numbers should be and I can't find a guide anywhere. Old games are hard. I Google'd "correct bust/waist/hip" measurements and was able to proceed with 36, 24, and 36, but got uncomfortable when the game asked if porngal was older than 18 or not (of course she is). And then again at "deep red, granite hard nipples." What an odd game. Plus, porngal did not want to slip away for banging to a TGI Friday's bathroom. Rude. I actually formally lost when I couldn't pick a correct place to go. Tip: "your house," "home," "car," "alleyway," "TGI Friday's bathroom" are all no-go. Probably should've went with hotel but, c'mon, they're expensive. Anyways I'm going to stop playing this game now, but please tell me if you get any further with porngal (or the female of your choice). |
| Majora's Mask 3D special edition gets Skull Kid figure Posted: 06 Jan 2015 03:00 AM PST Nobody knows many days remain until The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask 3D falls from the sky, but whenever it does arrive, it's coming with a limited edition in tow. Nintendo has announced a special bundle including the game and a Skull Kid figure, pictured above. The package will retail for $50 and launch alongside the standard version this spring. The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask Limited Edition Bundle [Amazon, GameStop] |
| Alaska, vampires, Jurassic Park: Ubisoft polls future Far Cry settings Posted: 06 Jan 2015 02:30 AM PST Not that it was in doubt after Far Cry 4's sameness (to FC3), but Far Cry has been Ubisoft'd, its mechanics ripped and torn from one setting to another in the name of disconnected virtual tourism. Ubisoft polled its fans on the future of the series, as picked up by Eurogamer, and the options are just, "Far Cry in..." which I guess is fine, but a little less interesting than, say, Far Cry 2 seems to be. If they go far enough, it could feel fresh. The Spaghetti Western option appeals to me if the tone is right. Peru and Alaska feel like more of the same. A return to Far Cry 4's world, which is an option for people whose favorite color is beige and favorite food is toast, really would be more of the same. Then there's some spit balling, maybe more suited for kooky standalone, downloadable games (a Blood Dragon sequel was one of the options, too) unless Ubisoft wants to be a bit bold: "a Far Cry game where you can fight against or join vampires," "a Mad Max-style post-apocalyptic world," or "a Far Cry game set in the modern day on a Jurassic Park-style island with dinosaurs." I wonder if that Mad Max game is happening what with Avalanche busying itself on Just Cause 3. The new movie looks weird, almost airbrushed clean like that live-action Speed Racer. Anyways, I vote for Far Cry 5 they just make Prey 2. Ubisoft polls public on future Far Cry settings [Eurogamer] |
| Do you trust Techland to make a good game? Posted: 06 Jan 2015 02:00 AM PST Dead Island was a massive hit for Techland, due in part to the massively misleading trailer for the game. Having played through it with a co-op partner, I found some enjoyment out of it by way of the multiplayer element, but it was a buggy mess that I wouldn't recommend to anyone. Dead Island: Riptide was basically more of the same. Before that, Techland handled a bunch of shovelware on top of a few big games like Call of Juarez: The Cartel, which was also a mess. So why is there so much buzz for Dying Light, which is set to drop later this month? |
| Old Man Kung Lao shuffles his weary bones to the next Mortal Kombat tournament Posted: 06 Jan 2015 01:30 AM PST Everyone's favorite Odd Job-inspired warrior will be returning to the bloody fray in Mortal Kombat X. Kung Lao's return was confirmed in the most recent issue of GamesMaster Magazine. And, as always, cutting-edge fashion will be very important to him. (I'll show myself out.) |
| Wikipad will debut its iPad controller in March Posted: 06 Jan 2015 01:00 AM PST Remember the Wikipad? No? Well, you maybe you will remember this news story 10 minutes after you read it. No? Well, here goes anyway. The same company is crafting something called the Gamevice, and it fits around an iPad Air or iPad Mini and apes an Xbox controller. Like all MFi controllers it'll support most modern games released on the App Store, including hundreds of titles that have been retro-fitted with the functionality. It'll drop in March for $99. Wikipad Shows Off Gamevice iPad Controller [Game Informer] |
| Nintendo offering limited edition New 3DS to Club Nintendo members Posted: 06 Jan 2015 12:30 AM PST Some Nintendo fans in Europe woke up to a surprise this morning, an opportunity for a limited "Ambassador" edition of the New 3DS handheld. The limited edition hardware bundles in an exclusive front cover plate, a pair of Super Smash Bros. cover plates, and a charging cradle for £179.99. It can be ordered, if you qualify, through Club Nintendo. This announcement has caused some confusion, owing to the use of "ambassador," the same term Nintendo used in their placation of pre-price drop purchasers of the original 3DS. Members of that "Ambassador Program" (which awarded Virtual Console titles to qualifying 3DS owners in 2011) are not necessarily eligible to buy the new hardware, as Nintendo has extended the offer only to, "selected Club Nintendo members." No word yet if a similar offer is being extended to Club Nintendo members in other regions, though it seems likely we won't be waiting long to find out. The European offer expires on January 12. [Via Eurogamer] |
| Man at Arms crafts Dante's Rebellion Sword from Devil May Cry Posted: 06 Jan 2015 12:00 AM PST The Man at Arms series is badass. The recreated weapons are incredibly faithful, and next up is another videogame themed episode -- this time based off of the Devil May Cry series. This rebellion blade has been featured in Devil May Cry 2, 3, and 4, as well as the anime. Get a look at the creation process in their newest video above, or skip straight to 11:00 to see the finished sword! |
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